It finally happened. I have finally witnessed the most unbelievable display of ass-hat driving that I could have possibly imagined. Oh, I can certainly ponder a slew of slapstick automotive events which could grace the filler of a Jackie Chan film, but what I’m referring to here was real. Very real. Yet, unbelievable.

In short: as I was riding up the mountain on my way home the other night (quietly snickering at the fact that my GoldWing still had acceleration going up a mountain side, nearly as much as on the flats) when I rounded a corner and spotted an SUV, facing the wrong way on the opposite lane of the road. Note, I said “facing” the wrong way, not traveling the wrong way. The vehicle was traveling in the correct direction for the side of the street it was on, it was just facing the wrong direction at the time.

Though not at great risk of being hit, I swerved far to the right as I went past and took a peek inside the vehicle. A dark haired woman was in the driver seat. She was talking on her cellphone while gesticulating with the other hand. As she was talking she was looking at herself in the center mirror from a distance of a foot or so, either inspecting her makeup or counting pores. In any case, her attention was on anything but driving. Dumb as a rock, that one.

I rode past and tallied up the score: this woman was rolling down a mountainside in an SUV, backwards, no brake lights on and accelerating, paying attention to her phone and her face, but oblivious to the road. Easily 100 points out of 100 for stupidity, with 20 extra credit points for being totally ignorant of the situation. I crap smarter than this.

I rounded the next corner and lost sight of her. I was tempted to turn around, but I was actually worried that I might get hurt in her spasms of attempted correction. Better to hear about it on the radio than to be part of it.

I saw no signs of an accident at the bottom of that run when I went into work this morning. I would hazard a guess that she became aware of the fact that she was rolling backwards down the mountain at some point during her phone conversation and took steps to correct the situation. I have to wonder which side of the road she was on when this happened.

I’ve talked about it a few times in this blog and I’m sure many readers are sick of it: but I feel it is my civic duty to warn outsiders about the dangerous conditions in Utah. Seriously, I’d rather take my chances in the desert without water for a week, or the flash flooding through the slot canyons during the rainy season, than to challenge the overwhelming stupidity of the average Utah driver.

If you’re visiting Utah, consider yourself warned.

The World of Warcraft clans are probably well aware of this site, but it was my youngest who pointed it out to me. He knows I’m a fan of comic and anime art, and an old D&D player, so the theme of the comic would fit into my interests.

There are a handful of somewhat stereotypical characters, in a somewhat stereotypical plot at times. For me, it’s the noble, honest and good hearted efforts of the character named Richard, which appeals the most. After all, anyone who dedicates their ambitions for the honor of ponies is hard to dislike. Plus, he has a way with children.

Check out Looking for Group if you have some time and a few trolls to kill.