Archive for the ‘Motorcycles’ Category

Back in the Saddle Again

Tuesday, December 1st, 2009

I was leaving the checkout when a young woman came up to me, presumably by identifying my riding gear, and asked, “Is the red motorcycle out there yours?”

My immediate thought was, this can’t be good.  “Yes.”

“I just backed into it.”

Definitely not good.

I followed her out into the parking lot and there was my GoldWing, laying on her starboard side, with the back corner of the port saddlebag smashed. The marks on the ground where the crash guards had dug into the pavement, told that the bike had been pushed about half a foot on the ground once it was over.

To say that I was pissed off is an understatement.  How can anyone miss an eight foot long, bright red motorcycle? I went to the starboard side, checked to make sure the kickstand was in the down position and picked the bike up by the handlebar and passenger hand hold.

After looking it over, I was estimating at least a $1000 repair bill, and the damage was slight. I asked the gal if she had called the police and she said she didn’t think they needed to be called. I informed her that if the damage was over $300, the police had to be on the scene. This might not have been the complete truth, as I don’t know the specifics of Utah law on this, but this is the general limit for most states.

She again insisted that the police did not need to be contacted and I informed her that she could call, or I would.  She called them and in the process called a male friend of hers, who arrived a few minutes before the police arrived.

The woman I was upset with, but I had not raised my voice. I didn’t lecture her and I saw no need to even talk to her until the police were on the scene.  What would be the point?

She had other plans, however, and proceeded to remark on how little damage there was and again didn’t see why the police had to be involved.

I replied by giving her a short story on how I had replaced the starboard saddlebag cover, which was $450 for the part alone, and was about to go into all of the damage I saw on the bike, when her male friend suddenly shouted at me, “You don’t talk to her! You have no reason to talk to her!”

I had kept my cool up to this point, but my mind was seething now. I wanted to tell this worthless little fucking asshole that no one here had named him god and that he had absolutely no authority over me, telling me who I could or could not talk to. I wanted to tell him how little I thought of his opinion and that I was only responding to her instigation of a conversation, and that if that he was so fucking worried about her talking to me, he should advise her to shut the hell up…

Instead, I said nothing. What would be the point?  His tiny little brain wouldn’t have understood the situation anyway.

No, I had only to wait for the police to arrive.

Her friend left after a few minutes, saying, “I hope it works out for you” as he walked past.

I replied back calmly, with a slight menace to the tone, “It will.”

A few minutes of silence later, a squad car pulled into the lot.  He parked next to me and the woman walked over. The officer asked me what had happened, and I told him the truth, “This lady came to tell me that she backed into my motorcycle, so I went outside and found the bike on it’s side.  I don’t know more than that, because I didn’t see it happen.”

The woman was instantly pissed and snarled, “Give me some credit.”

I was about to start into a lecture, but figured it wouldn’t be worth it.  How could I explain to someone who is already upset that I can’t give conjecture to the officer?  I could only tell him the facts and the facts were that I didn’t know what happened, other than she had admitted to running into my motorcycle.

The officer took her aside and asked her what had happened and though I couldn’t hear the conversation, I read her lips enough to know she admitted to hitting the bike and knocking it over.  She claimed that she didn’t see it, which seems obvious to me.  While she confessed to her transgression, I started to ponder what kind of living hell she would be in at this moment, if it had been a pedestrian she had backed over instead my motorcycle. Machines can be fixed, or even replaced if they are damaged beyond reasonable repair – but people can’t be put back together all that easily.  I wonder if she had thought about this at all?

Because it wasn’t just a motorcycle she hit.  It was a big red warning sign – an 850 pound wake-up call that she needed to slow down and use far more care when wealding the most dangerous weapon she owns: her car.

The officer went back to his vehicle, plugged the registration and insurance information for both of us into his report and printed off a copy for each of us.  This is what I wanted.  This is what I had been waiting for.  I now had a police officer’s testimony that she had admitted to hitting my motorcycle.  This is what was needed to keep the fight with her insurance company to a minimum.  Again, whether she understood this or not is unknown, but I would guess she hadn’t a clue. She seemed nice enough, having come in and informed me of the accident, rather than driving off – but on the other hand she could have been forced to do so, because the parking lot was very busy and there were most likely a half dozen witnesses at the time who would have pointed the finger at her.

Hit and run, even just property damage, is a very bad move.

So, whether it was her decent nature or self-preservation, I don’t know to this day.

When I got home I called my insurance company just to let them know what was going on.  I then called her company and filed a claim. The usual phone tag game was played and the bike went into the shop for appraisal.  The accident was on the fifth of November and I didn’t get the bike back until the 27th.

My estimate was damn close.  It was about $1200 to fix, though the shop missed damage on both brake lights on the port side, which I’m now having to send photos of, so that they can file this with her insurance as well.  My guess is I’ll have to eat it, because they screwed up the first time.  I won’t be pleased if this is so.

The shop was unable to find the exact replacement highway pegs, Mick-O-Pegs.  They’re still in business, so I don’t know how they missed it.  They replaced them with Küryakyn highway pegs, which I don’t find as functional, but honesty do find to be more comfortable and better looking. In the end, I’m not upset with the change.

One thing I do regret, which might have sped things up with her insurance as well, is that I didn’t demand a rental car.  I was out for three weeks without my primary transportation.  I won’t make that mistake again.

As for the woman who hit my bike, I have no harsh feelings.  I was pissed at the situation, not at her. I doubt she would have understood that at the time.

No, the only anger I have toward a person, is toward her little shit of a friend, who thinks that he has the authority to tell me what to do. I needed to keep things peaceful, so that the law would be on my side when it arrived, otherwise I would have stopped my conversation with her as requested and leveled it in a very close and uncomfortable fashion at him.

Saddle Sore

Monday, March 9th, 2009

GL1800I hit a milestone on my Goldwing yesterday, as I rolled over 50,000 miles on the odometer.

I bought the motorcycle in late September, 2003. Though I was one of those hit with the infamous Goldwing frame weld problem, it took less than two weeks to have the frame re-welded and no other system of the bike has come to trouble.

Of all the creature comforts and little blessings in the design, it is the engine which comes out being the most desirable part of the bike. 1,832 CC’s is hardly small and at 124 ft/lbs. of torque and 120 horsepower, the 850 pound monster still manages zero to sixty in four seconds flat. That speed of throttle has saved my ass from the Utard drivers more than once, as I was able to avoid blind merging, running red lights and other phenomena in the nearly endless menu of driver stupidity in this state. The braking is equally impressive for a bike its size, which again has saved my life more than once.

Either it is a testament to my willingness to compromise or simply to be satisfied with the way things are, or it is a statement on how well the bike fits me, but the only add-on’s I’ve installed on the beast have been highway pegs, power outlets and a GPS. Perhaps someday I’ll want a custom saddle, but so far my iron butt is holding out. Probably the most grueling ride I’ve done on this bike was a 22 hour ride from Salt Lake City to Minneapolis (including a half hour nap on a stone bench at a highway rest stop.) Because I was resting along the way, my failed Alaska attempt in 2004 wasn’t near as bad. Not that it lacked the miles. I went from Salt Lake City, up through Glacier National Park to Jasper, across to Vancouver, down to San Francisco, across to Akron, IN, up to visit family in Minneapolis and back home in six days on the road. That added up to about 4,800 miles total. Aside from running into a complete jerk posing as a border guard coming home from Canada, the trip was highly enjoyable.

I was trying to work out the money and time to hit Alaska this year, but financing simply isn’t going to happen. My wife and I are going to be spending far too much on house renovations this year to swing the trip. This leaves me with the conundrum of planning some other, less involved trip.

One possibility is to make a run to do the Tail of Dragon at Deal’s Gap, NC. This is probably the most famous motorcycle road in the country, following over 60 miles of mountain scenery, with one stretch of 11 miles of it holding 318 curves. Nothing gets a biker’s heart going more than a good road full of “twisties”. My only concern is just how popular the road is. There have been more than one horror stories of crashes due to riders pushing the envelope past their skill level. Being involved in such a skirmish doesn’t thrill me any.

Another thought is to hit the west coast again and spend more time in Oregon and Washington. I have a deep love for the upper northwest and wouldn’t mind spending more time in her mountain forests.

In any case, I’ll have to do some kind of trip this year. The winter has been a long one, with the most days called on account for snow that I’ve had in the decade I’ve lived in Utah. The cold doesn’t stop me, but icy roads do.

(Photo credit Honda Motor Co., Inc.)

Blissful Ignorance

Wednesday, September 3rd, 2008

I’ve come to the conclusion that following the Mormon faith makes you into an idiot, even if you didn’t start out that way.

Case in point, the drivers in the state of Utah. This morning, while motorcycling to work, I once again nearly died due to the amazing ignorance of the typical Utah driver. I call them Utards, for short. It started off typically enough, with two cars on the south bound two lanes of a divided highway, driving side by side. Neither would speed up or slow down. They were a moving wall. Eventually the one to the left decided that he wanted to merge to the right and signaled (a rarity) but when he tried to speed up to make some space, the car on the right sped up as well, to keep in parallel with the other.

This stalemate lasted for about twenty or thirty seconds, until the driver wanting to merge finally decided that he needed to speed up more than he had been and finally got ahead and merged to the right, in front of his previous dancing partner. They remained in this position for several seconds, with no sign of change, so since we were still about ten miles per hour under the limit and the car which had been on my left had fallen well behind, I decided to change left and pass them.

About the time I was half way past the rear car, with a conveniently placed metal guard to my left, he decides to merge into me without signaling his intention, or obviously checking his blind spot. He didn’t even check his mirror, to be honest. I clamped down hot on the brakes and for once managed to hit the horn at the same time (often I don’t have time to do this.) He suddenly spots me, over-compensates and nearly goes off the other side of the road into the ditch.

With my heart in my throat, I make my way past both of these dimwits and take a left turn off onto a freeway entrance ramp. This ramp leads up to it’s own lane on the freeway, which ends after about a quarter mile – to allow for smooth merging during rush hour. As I’m approaching the last eighth of a mile of this lane, moving faster than the freeway traffic to my left, another moron decides to merge to the right – right into me. No checking of the blind spot. No checking of his mirrors. He just cheerfully starts to merge into me, as I’m moving past. A quick downshift and twist of the throttle and I’m barely out of harms way again, with the driver merging in behind me, suddenly braking hard as he spots me.

First off, why the hell was he merging into a lane that was going to end in less than an eighth of a mile? There was clear visibility on a straight, flat shot of road – with at least one sign indicating that the lane was going to end. Secondly, why would either of these idiots merge without even the slightest check of clearance? Thirdly, why do they react with absolute shock that a vehicle is suddenly in the position they never checked? It’s like the time I was rear ended in my truck and the driver of the car behind me claimed to the police officer that I was in his “blind spot”.

From conversations I’ve had with various Mormons in the state of Utah, I’ve come to understand that they are completely, utterly ignorant of anything outside of their religious teachings. A great example was a conversation with a supposedly “open minded” Mormon, who’s first question asked of me was “what religion I was”, as if everyone needs a religion to exist. When I told him that I was atheist, he clearly couldn’t understand the concept that I don’t worship anything and when I stated that I saw at least some reasonable ideas in Buddhist concepts, his reply was, “So you worship Buddha, then?” Silly me, here I assumed even Buddhists don’t worship Buddha. Buddhists don’t worship anything. Never would I have guessed that finding reasonableness in some religious tenant is a declaration of worship of the religion’s namesake.

It wasn’t until I had a conversation with another Mormon acquaintance that I found the answer to the driving dangers and other stances of ignorance in Utah. He is a lapsed Mormon, much to the ire of his family, and he plainly stated that most in the church have a deeply entrenched belief that God is protecting them from all harm. They believe that a mystical, magical figure is guiding their hand in every action and keeping them safe – no matter what.

So, there you have it. They merge without even looking in their mirrors, they turn and change lanes without signaling, they make U-turns through red lights at intersections, they check their makeup in the mirror while rolling backwards down a mountainside – because they believe that God is guiding them and keeping them safe. Like religious ostriches, with their heads planted firmly up God’s ass, they remain blissfully unaware of their surroundings, with the unwavering belief that their mystical maker is going to co-pilot every aspect of their life for them – allowing them to absolve themselves of any personal responsibility and any action of caution that others outside of this delusion would take for granted as required.

Perhaps I should just be thankful that they’re blissfully ignorant. If they knew what was going on around them, I’m sure the reaction of shock would be more than those outside of the Mormon church would want to deal with.

Maybe it’s the water?

Tuesday, May 1st, 2007

As a motorcyclist, I enjoy the sights, sounds and smells of a trip to levels that simply are not possible when stuck in a cage, er…car. The experience is beyond compare, even to bicycling, as at least for me, I’m too engrossed in the workout to really enjoy my surroundings when I’m peddling.

There is one sound I don’t like to hear on a motorcycle, however, that’s the sound of screeching tires behind me. In this case, I had already spotted the moron and had taken steps to dash to the side of the car in front of me, but the sound is not any less disconcerting. I’m not exactly sure what shit for brains was doing aside from driving, but it must have taken all of his attention. He had, at the very least, a mile long straight shot of nothing between his approach and the light I was stopped at. Assuming he couldn’t see the arc lamp like, bright taillights on my GoldWing, or the lights of the vehicle in front of me, or the lights of the vehicles in the other two lanes next to us; you would have hoped that he would see the traffic semaphore.

Such seemed to be par for the course for the commute this morning. I counted eight lane changes without signaling, five of which without looking – even in the rear view mirrors – to see if it was clear for the maneuver, three of them attempting to merge into me. One U-Turn through a red light (what the hell is it with this retarded stunt in Utah?) and five turnouts from side roads and parking lots without checking for oncoming traffic. Mix in four left hand turns through a red light, at least a half dozen running of a red light and two vehicles driving down the center line between lanes for no less than a full block (no, I am not joking!) – and you get one hell of a tally for a morning drive. All of this, was during a ten mile commute.

It is seriously a wonder that road fatalities in Utah are not higher.

To be honest, however, the lead Utah had in bad driving habits is quickly being closed in by other states. It seems as if the quality of drivers is declining in general and I have to ask why. What has changed? Is it something in the water?

Certainly there have always been those who would perform retarded stunts and general mayhem when behind the wheel, but they used to be the exception to the rule. It seems like they’re becoming the norm. I am well aware that public education is declining in near free fall, but I guess I made the mistake of assuming that driver education wouldn’t necessarily fall with it – as the government has a vested interest in keep the roads safe.

In any case, I’ll continue to ride with the attitude that everyone else on the road has been hired to kill me, and hopefully I’ll make it through my autumn days intact.

Life is a Road

Tuesday, April 24th, 2007

Daniel Meyer has a style of writing that’s easy to get into. His ramblings are more than just entertaining, they’re down right philosophical. Of course, since most of his work is devoted to motorcycling, I’m biased in his favor.

You can catch his online work here.