A dear friend of mine is going through some dark times at work and home these days, which has him questioning a lot of the reasoning of how things are done by his colleagues and even family. We’ve talked on the phone about his thoughts and misgivings, but his first text message to my cell phone in this conversation, got me thinking the hardest.

“It just finally sank in that you and I take for granted or as rote, what others consider forbidden, evil or sick…”

At first glance one might take this statement the wrong way, but the meaning was clear to me. He was talking about the thin veneer of “normalcy” that people in our society like to present, sticking their heads in the proverbial sand when something rears its ugly head to prove their little preconceptions of reality to be false. He was referring to the bulk of humanity in the “first world” which staggers around in their special, imaginary “harm free zones”, pretending that somehow, someway, they are immune to injury or ill – as if some guardian angel is watching over them.

Neither my friend or I suffer from this kind of delusion. Cynical as it might be, we take for granted that there are people out there who have no kind feelings toward us or our loved ones. People who at a moment’s notice, would actively cause harm – with even a sense of glee. We know they’re all around us, hiding behind that veneer, trying their best to fit in, until they can’t stand against their impulses anymore and they strike out at someone.

We also know that nature throws things at us which are dangerous and upsetting – that we can’t possibly control. Animals who decide to know what we taste like, lightning that happens to follow the charge potential to where you’re sitting, storm winds which happen to rip the roof off the house; all striking with complete dispassion.

When these things happen to those who hide behind that veneer of normalcy, the reaction is typically out of control shock and hurt surprise. When these things happen to my friend or I, the response has always been a subdued acceptance and analysis of what steps need to be taken to correct or deal with the situation – and a rapid enactment of that decision follows. The process of thought is as cold and emotionless as that of a computer, but has the advantage of remaining clear and concise.

My thoughts turned to ask why this was? How was it we had developed this sense of acceptance that many others seem incapable of facing? Was it that we had suffered too many tragedies that cynicism set in? Or was it just part of our wiring?

Frankly, I can’t remember living behind the veneer of normalcy since I was very young. I don’t recall any tragedies happening to push my mind toward cynical acceptance of the world’s horrors. I had a good childhood. No, the attitude set in the more I read history. The patterns became apparent and constant tales of woe showed nature for its unpredictability and man for his constant expression of what can only be called, evil.

Let’s face it, for all the advances mankind achieved in the twentieth century, it was also our most violent and vicious period. The tens of millions of our own kind that we killed through war and genocide are almost too staggering a number to imagine. The weapons we’ve developed to kill each other in greater numbers are almost too efficient to believe. The more I read and the more I understood what we had done through two world wars and beyond, all painted a picture I couldn’t ignore. Mankind is less noble than he would like to believe. In fact, true nobility is few and far between. I know I can’t claim it, though I have tried to be so.

The twentieth century is why I have a hard time believing we will make it as a species past the twenty first. As we dabble with genetic engineering, nano-technology and new energies – we will turn them to ill. It’s pretty much inevitable. We’ve showed none of the needed maturity to handle our technology over the last century, so we will show the same deficiencies with the new technologies we’re now pushing.

In my own mind, it is a simple acceptance of our nature. We are apes bound by selfish instincts and jealousy, not social evolved enough to handle our inventions. Worse, the ugliest of human personalities, who crave power over others, not just their property – are drawn to the rolls of our “leaders” in society, where they scheme and play with human lives, as if playing with toy soldiers.

Many are going to read such and recoil, unable to understand how anyone could function on a day to day basis with this cold attitude about mankind. Yet, I can’t understand how anyone looking at the evidence could come to a different conclusion.

I will admit that it breeds a sense of futility. It becomes hard to motivate yourself for the common good, when you know that the impact will be fleeting at best. It’s difficult to bring yourself to contribute, when you’re pretty much convinced that it will do nothing in the larger picture.

Instead, I find myself concentrating on the care of myself and loved ones. I can do good for them which will last. I can make a difference in their lives, even if it is small in the grand scheme of things. I can do this without hurting anyone else in the process, which allows me to at least try to reach some level of nobility.

For when the world around you is filled with hatred and prejudice, you can either give in and follow suit, or hold yourself to a higher standard. Though I cannot change the world, I can change myself – and in the process bring good to at least a few around me.